Blaming, hating, or striking your brother brings the curse against you.  It makes us lie to our parents and to God.  Truth is always before God, and will be known to your family.  Our family, which nurtured us, is pained to see us fall to sin.  But we have hope from God’s promises that our children can be restored.  Cain was allowed to live, but his life was cursed and painful.

 Adam and Eve had initiated the curse of sin.  Now their payment was coming due.  As God was pained by the fall of his children, they now felt that pain for their children too.

Thou shalt not bow down thyself to them, nor serve them: for I the LORD thy God am a jealous God, VISITING THE INIQUITY OF THE FATHERS UPON THE CHILDREN unto the third and fourth generation of them that hate me; Exodus 20:5

Ah…this is directed to those who hate God; you saints are delivered!

Keeping mercy for thousands, forgiving iniquity and transgression and sin, and that will by no means clear the guilty; VISITING THE INIQUITY OF THE FATHERS UPON THE CHILDREN, and upon the children’s children, unto the third and to the fourth generation.  Exodus 34:7

 Again, he will target the guilty, not the repentant.  Adam had not yet met his redeemer, as the Old Testament saints awaited Messiah’s visit to Hell.  So he could only watch his family failing in sin with grief.


When we share our faith with others, we form a bond of family.  Genuine love forms, with all vulnerability to pain.  There is risk involved, because we can be rejected or insulted by those we come to really care about.  You only hurt the ones who love you, because your enemies don’t care about you enough to be hurt by your actions. 

YOUR CHRISTIAN FAMILY CHOSE TO CARE ABOUT YOU; they volunteered to take you as a supernatural family.  They suffer from knowing that turning from God will cause you the greatest pain of all.  You can lose the promise of eternity and face everlasting pain instead.  We will not be able to be with you ever again.  Your pastor and brethren are hurt to see you fail, perhaps more than your natural parents.

CAIN MADE A CHOICE to turn from righteous life to satisfy his bitterness and anger.  He chose not to relinquish the flaw of sin in his own life.  He did not allow a caring God to advise him in a critical decision time.  He chose an easy fix, a carnal deed, to eliminate the competition.  He ignored God’s personal warning against this sin of jealous anger.

ABEL WAS A SHEPHERD, and he slew a lamb for his tithe.  He sacrificed his best beloved lamb for God.  We do not know what Cain offered, but it may not have been his best.  We note that the world is shocked to see animals slain, but God had a plan in this.  The shepherd was a prototype for another bloody deed that would one day change the curse of man.  Abel himself became the first son of Adam to be slain by his brother’s sin.  Now we have trials as part of our daily life.


We don’t have to have a carnal reaction to setbacks.  Paul was able to have a great ministry in chains, and even in a shipwreck.  God has a way even when it makes no sense to us.  If we will trust God to provide, the ministry is his to direct.  It takes time for God to clean up the mess we have hidden within us.  Fire melts gold, and burns away the dust and grass that gets mixed in. 


My late wife and I finished a three-year ministry class, expecting to have the elders pray and give us a word about our ministry.  The Lord did not give them a word.  I felt cheated, having a lot of grand ideas about my calling.  Should I be angry with the teachers, or look for my own failures?  But how could I have carried on if I had gotten a revelation of my future?  In the coming years I lost my home, new cars, our life savings, health insurance, and even my wife.  I trust God to rebuild my life, but knowing ahead of time would have pained me.  What prophet could bear to share such news?  I have to trust God and his church.

CAIN WAS MARKED.  Sin leaves a pattern that others can detect.  It may take some time, but parents usually sense a lie.  Your Christian friends too can sense errors.  They are not all prophets, but guilt shows around the edges of our lies.  We tend to blame others, and this is a clue, or a sign of our error.

 THE SPIRIT OF THE LAW IS TO SAVE THE LOST (not blame or judgment)

Cain was marked to prevent revenge killing.  We are not to harm, but rather to try to help those who show symptoms of the mark of Cain.

 For the Son of man is come to save that which was lost.  How think ye? if a man have an hundred sheep, and one of them be gone astray, doth he not leave the ninety and nine, and goeth into the mountains, and seeketh that which is gone astray?  And if so be that he find it, verily I say unto you, he rejoiceth more of that sheep, than of the ninety and nine which went not astray.  Even so it is not the will of your Father which is in heaven, that one of these little ones should perish. 

GOD CAST CAIN OUT and we too have occasion to do this in the modern church.  We let spiritual babies go on with small errors until sin becomes too great to ignore.  Even then there is a legal process to address sin.  God still seeks his lost sheep.  This is the MATTHEW THREE-STEP:

Moreover if thy brother shall trespass against thee,

  1. Go and tell him his fault between thee and him alone: if he shall hear thee, thou hast gained thy brother. 
  2. But if he will not hear thee, then take with thee one or two more, that in the mouth of two or three witnesses every word may be established. 
  3. And if he shall neglect to hear them, tell it unto the church: but if he neglect to hear the church, let him be unto thee as an heathen man and a publican.   

The church can act on the spiritual condition of the body with power and authority.  This is only delivered AFTER the responsible effort to deliver the lost.  In every case, the accused is part of the conversation, not the subject of gossip.

Verily I say unto you, Whatsoever ye shall bind on earth shall be bound in heaven: and whatsoever ye shall loose on earth shall be loosed in heaven.  

This was all from Matthew 18:11-18


We are responsible to reject sin that threatens the family.  When a person is wounded, an infected limb may have to be amputated to save the victim.  The body of Christ must reject persons who are poisoning the body with bad teaching.

It is reported commonly that there is fornication among you, and such fornication as is not so much as named among the Gentiles, that one should have his father’s wife.  And ye are puffed up, and have not rather mourned, that he that hath done this deed might be taken away from among you.  For I verily, as absent in body, but present in spirit, have judged already, as though I were present, concerning him that hath so done this deed,  In the name of our Lord Jesus Christ, when ye are gathered together, and my spirit, with the power of our Lord Jesus Christ, To DELIVER SUCH AN ONE UNTO SATAN for the destruction of the flesh, that the spirit may be saved in the day of the Lord Jesus.  1 Corinthians 5:1-5

And if thy right hand offend thee, cut it off, and cast it from thee: for it is profitable for thee that one of thy members should perish, and not that thy whole body should be cast into hell.  Matt 5:30 (KJV)

This should feel like cutting off your own right hand if you are to lose a member of the body of Christ.  You will rarely have to defend the church this way, as most mischief in the church is not a sin unto death.  Our best ministry is by a good example.  Like Cain, we can best help by keeping our own sin in line.  In this way we can become sons of God.

Behold, what manner of love the Father hath bestowed upon us, that we should be called the sons of God: therefore the world knoweth us not, because it knew him not.  Beloved, now are we the sons of God, and it doth not yet appear what we shall be: but we know that, when he shall appear, we shall be like him; for we shall see him as he is.  And every man that hath this hope in him purifieth himself, even as he is pure.  Whosoever committeth sin transgresseth also the law: for sin is the transgression of the law.  And ye know that he was manifested to take away our sins; and in him is no sin.  Whosoever abideth in him sinneth not: whosoever sinneth hath not seen him, neither known him.  Little children, let no man deceive you: he that doeth righteousness is righteous, even as he is righteous.  He that committeth sin is of the devil; for the devil sinneth from the beginning. For this purpose the Son of God was manifested, that he might destroy the works of the devil.  Whosoever is born of God doth not commit sin; for his seed remaineth in him: and he cannot sin, because he is born of God.  In this the children of God are manifest, and the children of the devil: whosoever doeth not righteousness is not of God, neither he that loveth not his brother.  1 John 3:1-10 (KJV)

God was accused of cheating by Satan, and Eve did not allow God to face his accuser.  (Although we know that he sees all)  She let a false accusation guide her choice, and involved Adam in this gossip.  This sin reappeared in Cain, who blamed Abel for his sin.  God came to him with a warning, and thus demonstrated the private correction of Matthew 18.  But Cain used his freewill choice to pass the blame to his brother.  Abel was unaware of Cain’s charges against him, and was tried and convicted by a jury of one, his brother Cain.  Godly correction seeks to save, and the accuser of the brethren seeks to destroy.  The accused must be part of the investigation to make a complete and godly correction work.  If we judge, we fail to trust God to do his job, and try to do it for him.  It is unbelief.

By nature we have sin from Adam; we need to be superior to our nature to be holy, to have supernatural grace.  To be the sons of God, we need to be holy as he is holy.  Only with his supernatural help can we reach our goal.